“Well, hello!” she said with a million-candle smile that cut through the darkness of the bar. Even in those three syllables, you could detect a hint of a European accent – several, actually. She was about thirty, of medium build and height with shoulder-length blonde hair. Good-looking but not discomfitingly so, wearing an olive-colored knee-high beige dress that was conservative but flattering to her figure. If you saw her at the supermarket, you’d probably think she was a stylish professional lady, nice if not remarkable, and continue minding your own business.
And you would be mistaken, because Victoria K. is one remarkable woman – probably the most charming woman I have ever met. She was so powerful that, within 15 minutes of meeting her, I felt as if I would have given her anything she wanted, full Brahms CD collection included.
What did she do to win me over so completely, in so little time?
First, she was welcoming. She gave me a big, warm hello, looking at me directly in the eye with a big smile on her face, even though she had never met me before – a celebrity’s reception. This made me feel immediately at ease and a little flattered.
Second, she immediately started touching me. She held my hand for a while after shaking it, squeezed my forearm, held me around the waist for a few seconds at a time while speaking to me, periodically tapped me on the chest. While she spoke, she would lean in to emphasize a point, making deliberate body-to-body contact.
Third, she listened – then asked interesting follow-up questions. When she found out that I liked languages, she immediately inquired further, tested me on some of them (she herself spoke 5), digging deeper about a topic that was clearly close to my heart.
And fourth – the magic sauce – she was effusively complimentary. At least 5 times she said, “Omigod, you’re so funny” and giggled at my silly jokes. She complimented me on my outfit, my knowledge, my humor, my intelligence – basically, everything a guy wants to be complimented on.
Incidentally, I remember reading about a recent study testing the upper limit of the effectiveness of flattery. Surely, there had to be a point at which the compliments got too treacly, the unrelenting praise piled so high as to topple, demolishing any semblance of sincerity. Yes?
No. The scientists found there was no upper limit to the effectiveness of flattery. Even when people knew you were just pouring it on, they still loved it.
Now it is possible that Victoria was just really into my rugged good looks, ready wit and inimitable style. It’s also possible that Victoria is just really, really good, and can do this all day, every day. It may not surprise you that Victoria is a saleswoman. Specifically, she sells big-ticket items to exceptionally rich people.
Heck, she could sell steak to a Hindu. This woman was unstoppable.
Why? Because in the space of 15 minutes, she made me feel like a trillion bucks. I was airborne. And for giving me that feeling, I was willing to give her anything she wanted, and overcome any obstacle to seek her company.
Now Victoria may very well be an extreme case. I did say she’s the best I’ve ever seen. Yet what she did is free and available to any woman anywhere, 24 hours a day.
She listened. She looked me in the eye. She touched me early and often in a warm yet non-sleazy way, just beyond the limits of what’s customary (in America, that would be no contact at all), without going too far. She was incredibly generous with her reactions and her words.
This, my dear, is the power of the goddess. She elevates those around her, because she knows that praise, warmth and love are unlimited resources. In fact, the more you give away, the more you keep. And because of that, she has legions of men who would do anything for her.
Whether or not Victoria has a fulfilling love life I do not know – I had to leave before we got to that part. What I can tell you is that, should she be looking for companionship, she probably has a lot of choice.
Choice is power. Power is more likely to lead to fulfilling decisions, and lord knows that the world needs more powerful, fulfilled women.
And you know what else? A truly empowered woman is incredibly hot! Makes me want to put on some SPF 60 and just bask in her glow.
So how do we get started? How about a big, open smile and a “Well hello there!” that can melt an iceberg? Costs nothing – worth a trillion. And lets you own the next guy who turns the corner.
And you know what else is worth a trillion? The manual that gives you the power to discover your just-under-the-surface goddess power that’s been waiting patiently for you all this time. It’s called The Tao of Dating, and I’m happy to report it costs somewhat less than a trillion bucks. Re-read it if you’ve already gotten your copy, or get a copy for yourself and ten of your friends. It’s the #1 highest-rated dating book on Amazon (4.96/5 stars), so perhaps now is a good time to check it out and find out what’s up.
Go get ‘em
Dr Ali B