Dr. Ali "Victor" Binazir, Happiness Engineer

Modern Science and Ancient Wisdom for Living the Good Life

  • Beyond dating (for men and women): 8 Ways to Feel Great Now

    Looks like we’re living in interesting times.

    The financial markets are in a tizzy, people are losing jobs and homes, and there’s a pivotal election coming up on top of all that.

    Hey, just yesterday, even I got hit by a couple of nasty surprises, and lord knows I was pretty bummed out for a little while.

    I also know that what happened to me was pretty small in comparison to the hardships that some people out there have been experiencing.

    Some of you may have lost your home or entire community to natural disaster. Some of you may have had years of savings (seemingly) lost in a blink of an eye. Some of you may have lost a job while having a family to support.

    If that sounds like you, then read on. Because I have some encouraging words for you.

    Now I’m the furthest thing from a financial expert, so I’m not going to give you any pointers in that arena.

    What I can tell you is how to use your mind in a way such that you are happier, healthier and more effective as a human being. Because that’s the foundation from which everything else can work. (more…)

  • The Anti-Love Drug?

    I’ve always said getting married because you’re in love is like buying a car because you’re drunk — making a major life decision when you’re in a state of severely compromised judgment.  The following New York Times article talks about that and brings up some other interesting facts.

    In the new issue of Nature, the neuroscientist Larry Young offers a grand unified theory of love. After analyzing the brain chemistry of mammalian pair bonding — and, not incidentally, explaining humans’ peculiar erotic fascination with breasts — Dr. Young predicts that it won’t be long before an unscrupulous suitor could sneak a pharmaceutical love potion into your drink.

    That’s the bad news. The not-so-bad news is that you may enjoy this potion if you took it knowingly with the right person. But the really good news, as I see it, is that we might reverse-engineer an anti-love potion, a vaccine preventing you from making an infatuated ass of yourself. Although this love vaccine isn’t mentioned in Dr. Young’s essay, when I raised the prospect he agreed it could also be in the offing.

    Read the full story on NYTimes.com

  • Ask Dr Ali for Women: Picking the Wrong Men for Dating

    Today’s email comes from Susan who tends to have trouble picking men who are “right” for her.

    Hi there,
    Would your book be helpful for a woman to read? I seem to attract relationships with wifebeaters, dopeheads and binge drinkers!!!
    They all seem so charming and normal to start with. Is it just me?
    Regards,
    Susan

    (more…)

  • The Tao of Instant Liberation (in Dating and Beyond)

    This article is about how your perpetual happiness is pretty much in your hands right now. And I will state without proof that being a healthy, happy, optimistic person makes you more fun to be around. And that people who are fun to be around are just going to be more successful in the dating arena and beyond.

    Let me start with a quick little story.

    There’s something that I’ve been thinking about for a while – a couple of decades, actually. And recently it just really hit me in a way that it never had before, and I want to share that realization with you.

    (Bear with me as I go through some factoids that are potentially boring to non-basketball fans – it’s all to make a worthwhile point. Thanks :) (more…)

  • The Tao of Getting Out of a Dating Slump

    Greetings! I promised to write you an article on how to get out of a slump.

    Problem was, I was experiencing a bit of an idea slump myself. So I waited until the time was right. That’s going to be one of the themes of this article, as you’ll see.

    Have you ever experienced a slump? That’s what I thought. The structure goes something like this: You experience a setback. It shakes you up a little.

    As you’re recovering, another setback hits. Now you weren’t doing anything differently from before, but now you think you’re seeing a trend. This affects your beliefs and attitudes, which actually affects your performance, making more likely — you guessed it — another setback. (more…)